Monday, October 14, 2019

Treading Water

I think that I mentioned this in passing in one of last week's posts, but it's felt like I've had a lot going on lately. It's basically felt like treading water - I just can't seem to ever get ahead, or to feel like I'm getting on top of things. Each time I get something done, it's like there's a neverending list of things right behind it, and I never really feel like I'm making actual progress.
It's been a constant cycle of waking up, going to work, going to class if it's a class day, coming home, doing OTHER work, going to bed, and repeating the next day. Even my weekends have been fairly packed. Even if I'm not going anywhere, I'm not just reading or watching TV, either. I'm exhausted, both because I'm busy and because of the repetition and not having the chance for a real break.

When things start to get like this, everything in my life starts to feel a little bit chaotic. And that's not the way that I like to operate! While my spaces might always be a bit of "organized chaos," I don't like to feel like that mentally. I like to be able to know what I'm doing, when, and to have the satisfaction of checking things off my to do list.

So when I had an early-morning meeting this Saturday that ended right around when I usually wake up on the weekend, I decided to take advantage of the "bonus" time to get my life in order. I spent some time just making lists and feeling like I was getting things under control. I went through some of my closet and did a MAJOR overhaul. I even got back to planning some blog post content, so that I don't feel like I'm scrambling to come up with things to share. I never realize how much the chaos affects me until I start to get it under control, and then I breathe an internal sigh of relief. It just feels so much better when I have a handle on things.

So I'm getting there.... slowly.

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